Letters to my Sir: Thank you for being the man in my life

To my Sir,

I want to thank you for being the man in my life. This post is the first I have written in many months and it marks the countdown to Christmas, which is just ten days away. I've been thinking of ways to do something special for you this Christmas. So, I'm writing this entry as part of a series that I'm creating as a gift to you. I want you to have a body of work that expresses how much I appreciate you, details what I think about our love for one another, and celebrates our relationship.

Neither of us knows what the future might hold and that gives me even more reason to express my thoughts and feelings to you. I hope you'll read this entry and those to come and see these writings as my small way of telling you how much I cherish having you in my life and how deeply I love you.

This has been a hard year for both of us. Still, you've taken all of my messes and doubts in stride and let me know that you really do mean it when you tell me you are there for me. I feared that if I opened my heart to you, I might be setting myself up for another disappointment. For a while, I was convinced that investing myself in anyone was simply not worth the risk. After being abandoned by the lying coward who left me to deal with a pregnancy on my own, it was hard for me to imagine trusting anyone ever again. But despite everything, you healed my heart.

I worried over that situation, knowing it would be too much to ask you to take on. There was a point last month when I was so downtrodden. I was certain you would walk away--and I wouldn't have blamed you if you did. Instead, you shocked me by telling me the very thing I needed to hear you say: "You know that won't scare me away."

Your words and the conviction with which you said them erased all my doubts. You responded to something I felt so alone in dealing with by reassuring me that you have every intention of sticking around.

You are more of a man than anyone I've ever met. You've shown me what a real man looks like just by being who you are, but also by being more than I ever expected.

Last month I thought this Christmas would be the final insult to a bitter season and miserable year. But I feel differently now. Even though things are not perfect and life is not ideal and selfish people do shitty things, we are still there for each other and that is a blessing.

You've inspired me to look at the world from a new perspective and to embrace all the possibilities that our future together may hold. And when you tell me that you love me, I can feel how much you mean those words.

I can see that you love me by your actions and your treatment of me. You always make sure that I know how much you care about me. You never let a day go by without telling me how often I am on your mind and not just that you are thinking of me, but that you think highly of me.

Your love for me gave me strength when I was at my weakest point. I hope you will allow me to return that gift to you when you need my support.

I love you more deeply with every passing day and I want you to know how much you mean to me. I admire your strength, your intellect, and the way you carry yourself through life. You've reminded me to find gratitude even when things aren't easy. Thank you for being who you are and for making me laugh--especially when I get frustrated or feel sad.

No one has ever looked at me the way that you do. No man has ever mattered to me the way you matter to me. Your heart is my heart's home and your arms are my safe haven.

You are sexy and talented and genuine. Everything about you turns me on. I love the way we get each other. We think alike on so many levels, but I still learn new things about you all the time.

We may not always agree yet we always understand each another.

I will never stop showing you how much I appreciate the way you protect me and care for me and how you do so without me ever having to ask. You quiet my fears and chase away my demons.

I love you, baby.